The other day, someone looked at me and said: “You don’t look old enough to have a stepson getting married. ”
It was meant as a compliment, but I’ll be honest—it hit differently.
Yes, I’ve always had a baby face.
It's genetic.
My dad was carded for alcohol until he was 45. Even funnier—when he was 60 and still working as a business litigator, a client once told him, “I love having a young 40-year-old on the team… you all have so much more energy! ”
I’m 41, but in the corporate world, that youthful look can feel like a liability. Because here’s the truth: in business, age and experience often go hand in hand. And if people perceive you as too young physically, they sometimes underestimate the years you’ve put in, the expertise you’ve built, and the leadership you’ve earned.
And I know this isn’t just a feeling—throughout my career, I’ve been passed up on some opportunities simply because I looked young.
The Double-Edged Sword of Looking Young
On one side, people assume you’re approachable, energetic, maybe even adaptable. On the other, they may quietly wonder: Does she have the depth? The years? The scars that come from weathering corporate storms?
I’ve been in marketing leadership for two decades—long enough to launch global campaigns, lead award-winning teams, navigate multiple industries, and drive real business outcomes. Yet I’ve learned that perception can cloud reality.
Why This Actually Matters
When I share stories like this outside of corporate life, the reaction is usually something like: “Oh boo hoo… you look young. Poor you. ” Or the classic: “You’ll love it when you’re older. ”
Ah yes… I’m sure I’ll really appreciate it once I’m retired.
I get it. On the surface, it sounds like a non-problem.
But here’s the reality: in business, perception shapes opportunity. Looking young hasn’t just been an anecdote for me—it’s influenced the roles I’ve been considered for, the authority I’ve been granted in a room, and the opportunities I’ve lost along the way.
It’s not about whether someone thinks you’ll get carded at dinner. It’s about whether someone believes you’re ready to manage a multimillion-dollar budget, lead a global team, or sit at the executive table. That’s where the stakes are different—and that’s why these conversations matter.
Age Is Not the Only Signal of Experience
Experience shows up in how you navigate crises, how you lead people, and how you make decisions under pressure—not in whether you get carded at a restaurant.
Some of the most seasoned leaders I’ve known had youthful faces. And some of the “older” executives I’ve met lacked the resilience or adaptability that truly defines leadership.
The point is: experience isn’t a number, and it certainly isn’t a look.
What I’ve Learned Along the Way
- Let your track record speak louder than your face. Results, not wrinkles, build credibility.
- Carry confidence, not defensiveness. The more secure you are, the less those comments sting.
- Name the bias. Sometimes just calling it out—with humor or honesty—helps others reflect on their assumptions.
- Remember it’s a privilege. One day, I might miss being underestimated. Right now, it fuels me to prove people wrong.
And yes—while I may not “look” old enough to have a stepson getting married, my under-eye circles (and random grey hairs) would like a word.
